10 Steps to Help You Survive Gym Life
Step #1 – Wear Your Gym Clothes to Bed
This will make getting up at 4am for cardio or a workout much easier. You can simply roll out of bed, and zombie-walk to your car.
Step #2 – Pack Protein Everywhere
Put protein bars, protein powders, beef jerky, and cans of tuna everywhere! Gym bag. Car glove box. Desk drawers. ALWAYS be prepared. NEVER be without your gains.
Step #3 – Photoshop Yourself Into This Picture, Pin it Up at Work
Keep your motivation high! Photoshop yourself into this Arnold Schwarzenegger picture, and repeat the mantra… Arnold believes in me! Arnold believes in me!
Step #4 – Keep Your Gym Bag in Your Car
Never, ever, ever bring your gym bag into your house. Ever. Never, ever, ever. The last thing you want is to arrive at the gym, only to forget your pre-workout, headphones, and Versa Gripps.
Step #5 – Post a Social Media Swolfie Every Day!
Let the world know you lift! Post a swolfie every day. That way, you can remind yourself on rest days, or after cheat meals, that you do – indeed – lift. And whatever you do, don’t forget a #flexfriday biceps shot. Boom!
Step #6 – Release the Rage!
Forget the naysayers! Release stress during your workouts. Grunt. Grown. Yell. Scream. Turn your music up full blast and lift like you’re the only one in the gym. Who cares if people look at you funny. They don’t even lift! #RAWR
Step #7 – 2 Scoops, Baby!
Stimulants are your friend, and lifting is freaking hard. The struggle is real, sleep is the enemy, and your boss is a jerk. By the time you hit the gym, your tank is on empty. Turbo-power your workout with 2 scoops or pre-workout.
Step #8 – Create Your Own Fit Fam!
Marry into fitness. Find your swolemate. That special fit chick or fit stud. Tie the knot, and secure all future gains. Forge forward with purpose, creating children who will seeketh after gains.
#9 – Treat Sex as Cardio
Treadmill cardio is boring! We all know that. And… The benefits of sex are many. Instead of grinding out steady state cardio, turn up the heat by turning your love making session into heart-pounding, calorie-torching high intensity interval training.
#10 – Turn Every Free Minute as a Recovery Minute
Rest. Rest. Rest. When you’re not lifting, eating, working, or performing cardio (see step #9), become a sloth. Maximize recovery by doing jack squat.